THANG LONG UNIVERSITY ENGLISH DEPARTMENT ---o0o---
THE TRANSLATION QUALITY ASSESSMENT
USING NEWMARK’S MODEL
SUPERVISOR: Phạm Thái Sơn, M.A
STUDENT NAME: Bùi Hữu Phương STUDENT CODE: A32288 Hanoi- July 1, 2020
COMMENTS AND MARKING 1
TABLE OF CONTENTS
INTRODUCTION ...................................................................................................................... 3
I,THEORETICAL BACKGROUND .......................................................................................... 4
1. Translation Theory .............................................................................................................. 4
1.1. Definition of Translation .............................................................................................. 4
1.2. Translation methods...................................................................................................... 4
1.3. Translation procedures .................................................................................................. 5
2. Translation equivalence ....................................................................................................... 5
2.1. Definition ...................................................................................................................... 5
2.2. Classification of equivalence ........................................................................................ 6
2.2.1. Kade’s Quantitative equivalence ............................................................................ 6
2.2.2. Meaning-based equivalence ................................................................................... 6
2.2.3. Function-based equivalence ................................................................................... 7
2.2.4. Form-based equivalence ........................................................................................ 7
2.3. Translation Quality Assessment .................................................................................... 7
II, THE ASSESSMENT OF TRANSLATION ........................................................................... 9
1. Source text and target text ................................................................................................... 9
1.1. Original text by Noi Bai Catering Services .................................................................. 9
1.2. The translation by Noi Bai Catering Services ............................................................ 10
2. Evaluation of the translation basing on Newmark’s Model .............................................. 11
2.1. A brief analysis of the source language text ............................................................... 11
2.1.1. The author’s purpose ............................................................................................ 11
2.1.2. Characterisation of the readership ....................................................................... 11
2.2. The translator’s purpose ............................................................................................. 11
2.2.1. The translation method ........................................................................................ 11
2.2.2. Omission of original text ..................................................................................... 11
2.3. Comparison of the translation with the original ......................................................... 12
2.3.1. The title ................................................................................................................ 12
2.3.2. The structure ........................................................................................................ 12
2.4. The evaluation of the translation ................................................................................ 13
2.5. The translation’s future ............................................................................................... 14
CONCLUSION ......................................................................................................................... 15
REFERENCES ......................................................................................................................... 16 2 INTRODUCTION
English is the most commonly spoken language. However, most people prefer using their
native language. Therefore, translation and interpreting are necessary. This process helps
people understand and comprehend English. Translation takes part in spreading new
information, knowledge and ideas across the world. Translations gives benefits to a better
communication, has a great influence on literature, newspaper, commercial, movie and many
purposes need a translated version of original version.
The purpose of this essay is to summary theories of translation and give a detailed information
on which theories and procedures that translators used to translate from source language to
target language and assess the quality of the translated version from the text according to
Newmark’s model (text analysis, translation methods, translation procedures, translation errors (if any)).
I would like to use the translation of “Đặc sản Phú Quốc trên chuyến bay”. Both English
version and Vietnamese version were edited and translated by Noi Bai Catering Services. The
article is about Phu Quoc special dish and through this speciality and airline meals, Noi Bai
Catering Services and Heritage help to introduce Vietnamese cuisine to the world. 3
I,THEORETICAL BACKGROUND 1. Translation Theory
1.1. Definition of Translation
The definition of translation can be several. According to Catford (1965), “Translation
is the replacement of textual material in one language by equivalent textual material in
another language. Koller (1995) states that “Translation can be understood as the
result of a text-processing activity, by means of which a source-language text between
the resulting text in the target-language text and the source-language text) there exists
a relationship, or equivalence relation”. Peter Newmark shows his perspective about
translation “Translation is rendering the meaning of a text into another language in the
way that the author intended the text”.
To conclude, we can understand that translation is the act of transferring the linguistic
entities from one language in to their equivalents in to another language. 1.2. Translation methods
According to Peter Newmark, there are eight translation methods in total:
- In Source- Language: Word-for-word translation, Literal translation, Faithful
translation, Semantic translation.
- In Target-Language: Adaptation, Free translation, Idiomatic translation, Communicative translation. 4 1.3. Translation procedures
Vinay and Darbelnet suggest seven procedures that in direct translation are borrowing,
calque and literal translation, in oblique translation includes transposition, modulation,
equivalence and adaptation. According to Newmark’s, there are eleven translation procedures: - Literal translation, transference, naturalization, through translation,
transposition/shift, modulation, cultural equivalent, functional equivalent,
descriptive equivalent, couplets, other procedures. 2. Translation equivalence 2.1. Definition
Catford states that “The central problem of translation-practice is that of finding
target-language translation equivalents. A central task of translation theory is that of
defining the nature and condition of translation equivalence”. There are different
theories of equivalence. According to Mona Baker (1992), equivalence is the
relationship between a source text and a target text that allows the target text to be
considered as a translation of the source text. “Equivalence was a relationship between
two texts in two languages, rather than between the languages themselves”. (Jakobson)
Nida and Taber make it clear that there are not always formal equivalents between
language pairs. They therefore suggest that these formal equivalents should be used
wherever possible if the translation aims at achieving formal rather than dynamic equivalence.
2.2. Classification of equivalence
2.2.1. Kade’s Quantitative equivalence 5
- One-to-one equivalence is a single expression in target language is equivalent to a
single expression in source language.
- One-to-many equivalence is more than one target language expressions are
equivalent to a single source language expression.
- One-to-part-of-one equivalence is a target-language expression covers part of a
concept designated by a single source-language expression.
- Nil equivalence is that no target language expression is equivalent to a single source language expression.
2.2.2. Meaning-based equivalence
Werner Koller proposes five types of equivalence:
- Denotative equivalence is one in which the source-language and target-language
words refer to the same thing in the real world.
- Connotative equivalence is source-language and target-language produce the same
communicative values in the mind of native speakers of two languages. The
connotation transmitted by means of the word choices, with respect to level of
style, the social and geographical dimension, frequency, etc. This also called “Stylistic equivalence”.
- Text-normative equivalence is the source language and target language words are
used in the same or similar context in their respective languages, it relates to text-
type specific features or text and language norms for give text types.
- Pragmatic equivalence (communicative equivalence) is the source language and
target language words have the same effect on the reader.
- Formal equivalence (expressive equivalence) focuses on the form of the text:
rhythm, verse form, special stylistic forms of expression in syntax and lexis, word
play, metaphor… and particularly used in translation of poems, songs, etc 6
2.2.3. Function-based equivalence
Nida argued that there are two different types of equivalence, namely formal
equivalence—which in the second edition by Nida and Taber (1982) is referred to
as formal correspondence—and dynamic equivalence.
2.2.4. Form-based equivalence
Baker (2011) divides five levels of equivalence including equivalence at word
level, equivalence above word level, grammatical equivalence, textual equivalence, pragmatic equivalence.
2.3. Translation Quality Assessment
Translation Quality Assessment is an essential link between translation theory and its
practice (Newmark). This process focuses on the relationships between the source text
translated into target text, by evaluating sources, evaluating authors and translators and
evaluating source texts and evaluating target texts.
The translation quality assessment models have been created by House, Newmark and
many authors, professors. This essay will focus on Newmark’s models about
translation quality assessment. The comprehensive criticism of a translation has to cover five topics:
(1) a brief analysis of the SL text stressing its intention and its functional aspects.
(2) the translator's interpretation of the SL text's purpose, his translation method and
the translation's likely readership.
(3) a selective but representative detailed comparison of the translation with the
original in terms of both semantics and syntactic. 7
(4) an evaluation of the translation - (a) in the translator's terms, (b) in the critic's
terms as a piece of writing, independently of its original.
(5) an assessment of the likely place of the translation in target language culture . 8
II, THE ASSESSMENT OF TRANSLATION
1. Source text and target text
The text below is from the NoiBai Catering Services in associated with Heritage to
bring Vietnamese cuisine to the world through famous dishes. This text is edited and
translated by the NoiBai Catering Services. Both of original version and translated
version will be evaluated based on Newmark’s model.
1.1. Original text by Noi Bai Catering Services
“Đặc sản” Phú Quốc TRÊN CHUYẾN BAY
Tiếp tục đem tới cho hành khách những trải nghiệm mới mẻ, thú vị, trong tháng 8 này,
Vietnam Airlines ra mắt món ăn mới “Cá mú biển Đông sốt tiêu xanh Phú Quốc” phục
vụ trong các bữa trưa và tối dành cho hành khách hạng Thương gia trên các đường bay
Hà Nội – TP.Hồ Chí Minh/ Cần Thơ/ Phú Quốc và hạng Phổ thông đặc biệt trên đường
bay Hà Nội – TP.Hồ Chí Minh.
Cá mú Phú Quốc nổi tiếng thơm ngon, hiếm có nơi nào sánh được, bởi vùng biển ở
đây rất sạch, khí hậu ấm áp quanh năm và có nhiều rặng san hô, rất thuận lợi để loài cá
này sinh sôi, phát triển. Cá mú sau khi được tuyển chọn làm sạch, sẽ được các đầu bếp
của Công ty CP Suất ăn Hàng không Nội Bài cắt phi lê lọc lấy phần thịt tươi ngon nhất
tẩm ướp gia vị, chiên sơ tạo độ giòn, rồi phủ lên một lớp caramel tạo màu và sốt tiêu
theo phương pháp “Slow cook” (nấu chậm). Cách chế biến này sẽ giúp cho phần thịt
của cá được ngấm đều với gia vị và độ cay nồng của tiêu xanh Phú Quốc. Thưởng
thức miếng cá mú sốt tiêu thơm phức ăn cùng với cơm dẻo và rau xanh hẳn sẽ làm hài
lòng tất cả những thực khách sành ăn nhất. 9
Mang hương vị ngọt ngào từ đảo ngọc Phú Quốc, món ăn này cũng chính là một trong
những “đặc sản” của các vùng miền mà Vietnam Airlines hân hạnh gửi tới quý khách
trên những hành trình khám phá đất nước Việt Nam tươi đẹp.
1.2. The translation by Noi Bai Catering Services A Taste of PHU QUOC
Continuing our mission of delivering authentic tastes of Vietnam to our passengers,
this August, a brand new dish called “East Sea grouper with Phu Quoc green pepper
sauce” is being introduced. The dish will be served during lunch and dinner on
Business Class flights between Hanoi and Ho Chi Minh City/Can Tho/ Phu Quoc as
well as Premium Economy Class on the Hanoi-Ho Chi Minh City route.
The clear sea, warm climate all year round and coral reefs of Phu Quoc have created
favorable condition for groupers to thrive. Filets are seasoned and sautéed and then
slow-cooked Vienamese-style for a carmelized finish. This preparation, by Noi Bai
Catering Services Joint Stock Company, allows the filet to fully absorb the seasoning
and the fieriness of Phu Quoc green peppers.
Carrying the taste of Phu Quoc, the Pearl Island, this dish a specialty which Vietnam
Airlines is honored to serve passengers on your journey of exploring the beauty of Vietnam. 10
2. Evaluation of the translation basing on Newmark’s Model
2.1. A brief analysis of the source language text
2.1.1. The author’s purpose
As a Vietnamese cuisine ambassador, Noi Bai Catering Services brought signature
foods and beverages from every place in VietNam to the airplane fly across blue sky to
serve passengers. Heritage, along with Noi Bai Catering Services help to bring
Vietnamese cuisine to other people across the world.
2.1.2. Characterisation of the readership
The article is made for airplane’s passengers. Any passengers from young to old, to
First Class, Business Class and Economy Class.
2.2. The translator’s purpose
2.2.1. The translation method
This article was edited and translated by Noi Bai Catering Services. This translated
version has been used by faithful translation method, making words are translated in
context and by communicative translation method, making the translated version was
written at readership’s linguistic level and normalized the text.
2.2.2. Omission of original text
Comparing between the source-language text and the target-language text in
Vietnamese by Noi Bai Catering Services, there are some words, phrases and
sentences that have not been translated. Source-language text: 11
- Cá mú Phú Quốc nổi tiếng thơm ngon, hiếm có nơi nào sánh được, bởi vùng
biển ở đây rất sạch, khí hậu ấm áp quanh năm và có nhiều rặng san hô, rất thuận
lợi để loài cá này sinh sôi, phát triển.
- Thưởng thức miếng cá mú sốt tiêu thơm phức ăn cùng với cơm dẻo và rau xanh
hẳn sẽ làm hài lòng tất cả những thực khách sành ăn nhất. Target-language text:
- The clear sea, warm climate all year round and coral reefs of Phu Quoc have
created favorable condition for groupers to thrive. - Untranslated
In the first sentence, the bold phrase is untranslated. In the second example, whole
sentence is not translated by the translator.
2.3. Comparison of the translation with the original
2.3.1. The title
The title in the source-language is ‘“Đặc sản” Phú Quốc trên chuyến bay’, and is
translated into “A Taste of Phu Quoc”. The translator has chosen the word “taste”
instead of special food, speaciality to translate the word “đặc sản”. However, “a taste”
will give passengers, readers more feelings about food, especially Phu Quoc cuisine.
The phrase “trên chuyến bay” is untranslated but it can be minored because the article
focuses on the Phu Quoc special dish not just because it will be served on airplane,
making passengers, readers be curious about Phu Quoc cuisine.
2.3.2. The structure
The translator has changed the original structure of some sentences by adding some
phrases, commas, periods. This changes in order to make the translated version
become understandable to readers. 12 Original version:
- Vietnam Airlines ra mắt món ăn mới “Cá mú biển Đông sốt tiêu xanh Phú Quốc”
- … các đầu bếp của Công ty CP Suất ăn Hàng không Nội Bài cắt phi lê lọc lấy
phần thịt tươi ngon nhất tẩm ướp gia vị, chiên sơ tạo độ giòn, rồi phủ lên một lớp
caramel tạo màu và sốt tiêu theo phương pháp “Slow cook”. Translated version
- a brand new dish called “East Sea grouper with Phu Quoc green pepper sauce” is being introduced.
- Filets are seasoned and sautéed and then slow-cooked Vienamese-style for a
carmelized finish. This preparation, by Noi Bai Catering Services Joint Stock Company.
2.4. The evaluation of the translation
The translated version of the article is accurate, closest to the original version. The
translator has done well in translating and delivering the meaning of the text without
making it obscure or confusing. The structure of source-language text has been
translated faithfully. There are two phrases, words are untranslated. This omission
does not make the target-language text different from the source-language text because
information from two sentences are not take any significant impact on the meaning of
the paragraphs. However, we should translate every words and sentences to deliver
exact meaning of the original text and to respect the author. Therefore, the translated
has finished his work properly and gave readers an acceptable English version of the
article about Phu Quoc famous dishes. 13
2.5. The translation’s future
The text’s purpose is for introduce passenger special food from Phu Quoc that they are
going to enjoy during their flight. Moreover, this article is help to introduce to
everyone from other places to acquire more knowledge about zVietnamese cuisine
through Phu Quoc special dish. This text not only serve for Vietnamese person but
also for foreigners. Therefore, translate this article to English-an international
language is indispensable. It helps passenger, reader to find out and truly understand
about what the article is about. 14 CONCLUSION
To conclude, this essay has summarized theories of translation which related to the
translated version of the article “Đặc sản Phú Quốc trên chuyến bay” by Noi Bai
Catering Services. Firstly, it is necessary to mention the definition of translation,
translation methods and translation procedures. Secondly, two theories that have
connection to the translation and the translation quality assessment process are
translation equivalence, translation quality assessment and Newmark’s model.
Through the translation of “Đặc sản Phú Quốc trên chuyến bay” above, we can see
that the translator has fulfilled the task successfully in giving the exact meaning as the
original version to readers. Although there are phrases and words that are untranslated,
it is still convey the general meaning of sentences and paragraphs. Noi Bai Catering
Services and Haritage produce the article about Phu Quoc special dish in Vienamese
and English in order to introduce special dish for passengers in their flights and to
promote Vietnamese cuisine to people around the world 15 REFERENCES
1. Newmark, P. (1988), A Textbook of Translation, London, Pearson Education.
2. Catford, J.C. (1996), A Linguistic Theory of Translation, Oxford, Oxford University Press.
3. House, J. (1977), Translation Quality Assessment: A Model Revisited, Tübingen, Gunter Narr Verlag.
4. Baker, M. (1998), Routledge Encyclopedia of Translation Studies, East Sussex, Psychology Press.
5. Nida, E.A. (1969), The Theory and Practice of Translation, Leiden, E.J. Brill. 16